Alright, alright. I messed up.
Remember that time after the Miami Heat won Game 5, that I said
“This series is over. Done. Finito. The Heat are going to win this thing. Yep, I just guaranteed this series, Joe Namath-style. Now, I need to go find a piece of wood to knock on…”
(Because I’m sure as hell pretending like I never typed those words.)
What I have learned is
that I should have actually knocked on a piece of wood
A. Don’t ever count the Indiana Pacers out of anything. Period.
I don’t care if Roy Hibbert and Paul George are facing a bunch of super-powerful crazy-ass zombies that are trying to hunt them (so, like LeBron in Game 5) while they try to find a cure for Zombie-AIDS. (Sound familiar? This is essentially the plot of I Am Legend.) Not only will they show Will Smith how it’s done and shove a grenade down each and every one of those zombie m
B. Forget about Thunderstruck, Bosh-struck should win an Oscar for Best Documentary.
I don’t know if you know the movie Thunderstruck, but basically the premise is (spoiler alert!!!) that Kevin Durant loses his other-worldly ability to score to some prepubescent kid with a Bieber haircut, who promptly becomes an unstoppable basketball player.
Gripping cinema, I know.
But seriously, watching Chris Bosh play over the course of the postseason has literally been like watching Thunderstruck, or as I like to call it, Bosh-struck (only this is actually real life and not Hollywood).
For example, Chris Bosh played 31 minutes in Game 6. He scored five points. He grabbed four rebounds. And he had three turnovers.
And let’s not forget that:
Bosh has scored 68 points in this series (only slightly better than Lance Stephenson, who has scored 52).
Bosh has 22 rebounds in this series. Tyler Hansbrough has played only 60 minutes in this series and has 19 rebounds.
Bosh has sucked throughout the playoffs, but he has really sucked against the Indiana Pacers. (BTW, guess how many rebounds Roy Hibbert has this series? 65!!!)
The worst thing is that I can’t wait to see how Bosh-struck unfolds in Game 7.