Prepare for some heavy atrocities against the Miami Heat name.
It’s that time of year again; basketball is back and with it the NBA’s annual general manager survey.
The yearly list is the hoops equivalent of yearbook superlatives.
Each of the NBA’s 30 GMs vote on a variety of topics, with the winners given the honor of appearing in the full publication.
There are no cash bonuses. No playoff seeding enhancements. Just a pat on the back, until the survey gets stowed in a musty attic, only to be replaced 365 days later.
How managers exactly make their selections isn’t clear.
Leadership styles differ from team to team.
Where one GM, say the Sacramento Kings’ Vlade Divac likely employs a DeMarcus Cousins themed dart board to make his team altering decisions, Rob Pelinka of the Los Angeles Lakers is probably holding a war room session, illuminated by only the shimmering, holy light of Magic Johnson‘s teeth.
That is to say, with management styles differing among teams, so will their values.
Thus, an annual GM survey, while mildly representative of the league’s collective conscious, is no more binding than a contract signed by Dwyane Wade on the Chicago Bulls (he seriously fleeced them in that buyout).
Despite its relative insignificance, the Miami Heat were among vote-getters in seven categories, though the organization failed to top the charts in any class.
But while the Miami Heat were recognized in two fewer categories than in the 2017-18 survey, the team pushed into the top-five on three occasions, one more than last year’s popularity contest.
The results of the Miami Heat’s survey run can ultimately be organized in three ranks, based on their accuracy. The “Head Nod” category is for votes that were just right, aptly summarizing Miami’s position in relation to the rest of the league.
The “Deep Sigh” category is reserved for awards that Heat fans know in their heart of hearts are accurate, but continue to paint Miami as the irredeemable step-child of the NBA.
Finally, “Screw Face” (an angry look for those not so familiar with Jamaican patois) for rankings that will be met with downright contempt for the Heat fan base, potentially sparking a flurry of “boos” when the survey winners come to town.
(In reality, no one is even going to remember this survey come October 16).
Let’s dive in.